Charles at 60

The Prince of Wales is 60 now

but no Royal thought they might

send an order to The Poem Shop -

well, it must’ve been an oversight!

For even with the credit crunch

you’d have thought that the royal purse

could have run to the very reasonable price

of some personalised birthday verse.

But maybe they had other plans -

maybe someone had the notion

that they’d get it done for nothing

by the Laureate, Andrew Motion.

Yes, times are hard and no doubt Charles

will feel the pinch like us -

he’ll need to take advantage

of his free pass for the bus.

He’ll wait outside his Highgrove home

in most inclement weather

and no bus will come for hours then

two or three will come together.

With lovely wife, Camilla,

clad in woolly hats and coats,

they’ll tour the realm from the Duchy’s

furthest point to John O’Groates.

When they return, they’ll find Dad’s gifts

from Princes Harry and Wills:

a Stannah stairlift, zimmer frame,

Complan and heartburn pills.